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Sr Rae BerryThe University of Life - "Working in an Aged Care Facility"Talk given at the opening of the new wing of Loreto Home of Compassion, Wagga Wagga, NSW Australia, 30th April 2000. I have read articles about Age Care Facilities that make me wonder if the writer has ever spent more than one visiting hour in their whole life in such a facility. They never seem to be written by someone that actually works in them. I have had many years of hands-on care experience looking after old people. For me it was like attending a University, working for a degree in life skills. Knowledge was acquired through the following ways: The Residents were the Professors. They had lived life for eighty, ninety, and some for 100 years. Just by their life experience they had much to teach. The Residents’ families were the Lecturers. Their relationship to Mother, Father, some times Husband, Wife, enabled one to observe relationships as in a living Laboratory. Co-workers––Nurses, Cooks, Cleaners, Reception and Office staff, Gardeners, Handyman, they were one’s Peers. We learnt by shared experience. Doctors, Physiotherapists, Podiatrists, Diversional and Occupational Therapists and other Professionals shared their particular expertise and experience. From time to time there were the trades people–Builders, Plumbers, Electricians, Painters, Decorators. They taught about maintenance of the buildings you worked in. Dealing with personnel in Government departments, we learnt to appreciate those that were pleasant and helpful. At a distance I observed the work of the Florist. Volunteers bring life into the facility, which is different from those that work there. I could list more but this will give some indication of the variety of people who contributed to my education. So what did they all teach me about life? We will start with Residents. Three women shaped and moulded my life in a major way in my early years of nursing. The first old lady did not have any living relatives. She told me one afternoon that "I might be nice and smile on top, but underneath I was as hard as nails". This all came about because I insisted she had a bath, and not a sponge wash in bed as she requested. Her remark hit home–it challenged me to think of the many ways a nurse can misuse power. What difference did it make, bath or sponge, if I wanted a happy contented patient. I was not going to achieve this by insisting that my way was the only way to do things. I admired the courage of this woman to be so direct with her complaint. We sorted out our differences and became good friends. So I come to my second old lady. One evening I was settling Vera for the night. She was a beautiful old lady with short-term memory loss. As I tucked her in for the night I gave her a kiss. The reaction was instant! She sat up, eyes sparkling and said "Sister you have never done that before, kiss me again quick." Reflecting on this, I came to realise how important it is to love, and at times, show affection to the people you care for. It does not mean that I went around kissing all the old ladies good night! I became more sensitive to those that liked a kiss, a hug, or those that just liked to have their hand held. You may be an excellent professional nurse, but as St Paul would say "With out love, what is the point". My third friend taught me that age is no barrier to friendship, and what it was to be a free spirit. By the time you have become a Resident in Care there is not much more to lose. There is not a great deal that staff can do to you. Myrtle always made up her own mind and did her own thing. Eventually the staff just learnt that she was different, and accepted her differences. I have been taught about patience, hospitality and cheerfulness. I have observed what happens if you do not learn to control jealously and bad temper–the whole shadow side of our temperaments. If not dealt with, this will ride along for a hundred years and make life miserable. I have seen a woman of one hundred years jealous of the 90 year old in the bed next to her. There are many stories I could tell. I have learnt something from every person I cared for. Families have much to teach those that have had good relationships with their elderly parents, and those that don’t. One learns never to judge a family. The lovely old person we care for can be quite different when with their own family. They have had a shared life-time together. We come in only at the end. It is a privilege to look after a dying person and their family. At this time you often witness the grace of God working. Relationships can be mended, reconciliation of the dying person with their children, siblings making peace with one another. It is a great experience to reflect on the death of someone you have cared for. I ask myself the question why did this person take so long to die, and this one die so quickly? Did I do all that I could to enable this person to die well? Where did all the people come from at the funeral when so few people came to visit? There is much to be learnt from Co-workers. Some, by their example, put you to shame, while others ‘drive you up the wall’. It did not matter how old and inconvenient the buildings were, or how sick or contrary the patients are. If one has good relationships with other staff work will be fun and you can enjoy the challenges that each day brings. I have tried to understand and respect those I have worked with, and the rewards have been great. The Professionals bring both positive and negative learning. On the whole I have found them ready to share their knowledge and give good advice. Altogether I have learnt a great many skills to help me care for aged people–the clients are all so different that there is no one way that is right. The Trades people also have their part to play. Can you relate to needing a plumber on a Saturday or Sunday afternoon? Having no hot water in the morning? Maybe the central heating has gone off in the middle of the night, or a bell is stuck and you can't stop it ringing. I have learnt much about the care of carpets from the Carpet layer, how to look after the wooden exterior of the building from a Carpenter, and the Vinyl layer taught me there is no such thing as ‘maintenance free’. Every article in the place needs attention at regular intervals Let’s give thanks for the Florist and the joy that flowers bring to the person who receives them. Birthdays become a celebration, because someone has remembered and sent flowers. Staff are often alert to an anniversary worth celebrating. Flowers bring joy and happiness far beyond their price, because they say ‘someone remembers me’. I learnt never to throw them out without permission, just because I thought they were dead. Volunteers bring life and skills to the facility. They are an encouragement to those who work there. They are often role-models to the rest of us. You do not have to have great talents to be a good volunteer, only the ability to say what you could do and to turn up as promised. One man came one day every week just to prepare the pumpkin for the cook, and I looked forward to having a chat with him. Many trade and professional people also give their advice, skills, and time. The aged care facilities that I have worked in, especially the Loreto Home of Compassion, Wagga Wagga, have been places of incredible learning, fun and laughter, tears and frustration. What better environment could you wish for, to learn about life. Next time you pass or visit an old people’s home, ponder the life that is lived within. Sister Rae Berry D.O.L.C. "Let us have a balm for every suffering, consolation for every pain, |
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